Panic

i am panicing. Not going to lie about this. literally, i feel a panic attack coming on at any moment. it'll sneak up on me and like rain clouds rolling in, the tears will flow... and flow.

i wish this leaving thing was easier. i wish i didn't feel so undeniably close to my friends right now. i wish i could find a balance between spending time with my family and friends. i feel like these friends, if i don't keep watch and hold on tightly, will fall through the cracks and disappear. and i'm terrified.

i have exactly 3-4 real days left with friends and so much more i want to do.

Lord give me strength.